1) Haul worthless crap into the back of your pickup, 2 year Associate's degree, no driver's license required
2) Sit on stoop all day, 12 year PhD program, must publish
3) Play your awful music really loudly so my walls shake, night classes only (12am-4am)
4) Fake an injury to obtain long term disability, preference given to government workers
5) Illegal parking, concentrations in double parking, sidewalk parking, and "how the hell can that be legal!?!" parkings
It's...what day is it? Who cares, I don't have a job!