At least it's not the East River

Maybe they meant bodies

And now...

The Top 5 Indicators that your Neighborhood is a Piece of Shit

5) Your neighbor uses bed sheets as curtains.
4) Target spent money to electronically lock their shopping carts.
3) You voted in an abandoned house.
2) You watched a drug deal go down RIGHT OUTSIDE YOUR WINDOW.

And the #1 Indicator that your Neighborhood is a Piece of Shit...
1) The FBI came in a van and arrested people on your street!